X-ray? eXamine? Maybe a bit of both…
I was thinking last night about the persona I present here in blog-land. I think the “me” of this blog is more spiritual, more reflective… definitely more talkative… than the “me” people who see me day-to-day know. I’m undecided on how I feel about that. I certainly don’t want to put myself out there as someone I am not… and you are not going to read anything on this blog that is non-authentically me… but I struggle at times (okay, most of the time) about how I present myself in the world. What parts of myself I show… and when… and to whom. And how in the world that all adds up to me.
Sometimes it seems others have this remarkable ability to compartmentalize their roles in life in a way that I do not. Or they are able to blend everything together into this symphony of themselves in a way I do not. Or maybe everyone has these different aspects of self they show to different people and they are perfectly ok with that. (I don’t mean that I, or others, intentionally mislead people or hide areas…though of course we all do at times… just that we naturally show different aspects of self as we go about the many relationships and arenas we do life in).
So… x-ray… isn’t it great when you meet those people who know what you mean and get who you are even when you can’t quite express that? I absolutely adore my friends who ask how I’m doing… want to know… and call me out on it when they get a “fine” and that isn’t what they wanted to hear (or what I wanted to say). I love it when someone is able to put words (at least words that others can understand) on something that I am feeling and can’t quite express. And I love when I can do that for others as well. Those moments have been among my favorites of this blogging challenge.
(ALso, am I the only one out there who keeps getting middle-of-the-night “inspirations” on what to write that deviate completely from what I had in mind? I don’t think this is the greatest post-of-all-time or anything… but it came up and seemed like a decent idea. I was all set to write on XX — women in my friends and family who have inspired me… or womanhood in general, or something similar… guess I have more material for a later post!)