What If?

A week or so ago, a fellow blogger in the A to Z challenge blogged about the “What If” challenge. The idea intrigued me… I bookmarked the page… today I came across this web page. And wondered…

What if I post about infertility on my blog?

What if I post about it on Facebook?

Here we go.

April 24-May 1, 2010 is National Infertility Awareness Week.  Infertility affects 1 in 8 couples.  I’ve been one of them.   I’m not brave enough (yet) to post about just how difficult those few years were.  It isn’t just my story.  I don’t know that I want to go back there.  I don’t want to hurt those who (even unintentionally) hurt me.  I was one of the fortune ones.  I got a happy ending — the adorable 4 year old who often frequents my blog posts.  Maybe someday I’ll get another one.  Some couples dealing with infertility find a happy ending though adoption.  Some don’t find a happy ending.  Even for those with happy endings… the pain isn’t forgotten.  Even when we realize just how God used the experience to deepen relationships and deepen faith and deepen appreciation for the more difficult parts of parenthood.

The odds are that even if you aren’t personally affected by infertility at some point in your life, you will come in contact with many who are.  Here’s a snapshot of what they may be going through… and some hope.


Some couples are open about dealing with infertility.  Some are not.  So… be sensitive.  Don’t ask your childless friends who have been married for a while when they are going to have kids.  If you do and get a noncommittal answer, don’t ask, “What’s wrong?  Don’t you LIKE kids?”  (okay, guess I did share a little of my journey… thankfully from a stranger and not a friend… though in a sense that may be even more disturbing).   And, rather than share more of my life… I’ll just link to this great article from RESOLVE.

What if I leave up the Facebook post?

What if I publish this blog post?

6 responses to this post.

  1. Asking that question is insensitive! People always just assume without thinking.


  2. I’ve got a couple of friends who’ve had such a difficult time getting pregnant. It’s such a difficult time – people need to think before they speak!

    On another note, I’ve tagged you at my blog today 🙂


  3. You’ve touched my heart, and my history, with this one sweet Melody. We faced infertility while surrounded by home schooling families convicted to allow God to plan their family size. He was planning ours too but He kept ours small (I have one bio and 3 step kids) while my friends were having 7 or 8, sometimes more. Not an easy journey! I will pray with you that in His perfect time He would give you the desires of your heart and give you another child to raise and love!


  4. Melody, I had issues with infertility also. I was told I would need drugs to conceive naturally. People who don’t have problems just can’t understand, even if they want to. Thanks for sharing!


  5. Thanks, all! It means so much to get comments to this post… thank YOU for sharing and encouraging.


  6. Hi Melody, I just found a trackback to your post. This was an inspiring and courageous post to reach out and encourage others. Infertility is a tender and painful wound, in need of healing in more ways than skin deep. Thank you for sharing your What Ifs.


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